Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Day 80

Can you see how hard I'm trying here?

hello people. hello hello hello.

haritok aku nak update more to mok merepak kedirik.
aku bencik perasaan insecure. sometimes kdk.. i want to be pretty too. i want to be rich too. i want this i want that. i want that body. i want that leg.  i want that shoes that shirts that money that everything.

EVERYTHING.

kadang-kadang, bila compare kan dirik kta ngan orang lain, kta akan rasa down. kenak aku sik kdk sidak? am i that bad? how come i never be one of them too? its normal isnt it? kadang2 i cant hold it any longer.

insecure feelings when our bf ex lover, flirt-ayyy buddieh is way way better than we are. i have to admit this. sometimes i do feel that way. i do not know why, but i able to control the feelings and trying to live normally.

you know, my condition now memang terribly not good. not awesome at all. I had fail my maths paper so i have to repeat that sub in the next sem so i have 6 subjects all the way. aku terpaksa belaja kdk the same thing nok aku blaja last sem time class maths. aku terpaksa attend kelas nok sama kdk apa di blja aku dolok. aku rasa kdk fucking down. i never want this. NEVER.

my relationship? okay basically we end up being someone that actually in love with each other tapi. sik gerek? he didnt ask for it yet so we are now living a teman tapi mesra relationship. i dont know should i be happy or not but its okay. i'll leave it to him. i really love him more than everything. really. this time i manage to learn a lot of things. seriously. kta sik boleh selfish when it comes to relationship. kta mst pk ttg duak2 instead of one.

such as,
mtk break sbb kta pk nya sik happy an kta. haihh. its clearly stated that we're happy yet we gonna end up everything because of false assumption. FUCK IT. mun sik happy sik la tetak2 all the time.

when u stop smiling for no reason whenever thinking bout that person, stop smiling whenever looking at the pic that u guys took, or that person pic, to me, the love within it already gone. mati. mampus dah.


 haih abang is leaving to shah alam again soon. this comin sunday. you never know how it feels to be stuck at home. tgk orang pergi and come from u. and all u do is waiting for them to come back. sakit. sedeh. suma2 lah. sakit eh. sik pat di mejin apa di rasa. mok juak rasa kdk away from miri to feel how the exact feeling tinggal hometown and kdk balit kt hometown asa syurga alu-alu. haha.

last hol, 4 bulan cuti, aku sik pat g cne2. kdk.. wtfuck la. haih.

i dont know what else to say. lamak sik emo merepak mcm2. ok bye people. thanks for reading. ciao~

2 comments:

Unknown said...

hey chillah girl.
us human,have all these temptation.
but remember,what is important.
do you need it or do you want it?
its almost the end of the world alrdy
so remember what setan promise to Allah last time.

failure comes before glory.
if everything comes too easy u should be worry.
there's nothing easy in this world.
even berak pun perlu teran right?

find ur strength,use it.
dont find ur weakness and use it.

take care!

Hafizha Husini said...

hey there! thanks for the support. oh god, i never realised that someone commented on my post. thanks again. yeah, i think i shall stop looking for my weakness and try to use the flaw instead. thanks o you!

take care! xx

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