Sunday, May 1, 2011

Day 50

Hello everyone.

True love is like ghosts, which everyone talks about and few have seen.
- François, duc de La Rochefoucauld.

This is my day 50th post. So in conjunction of “50th-post-day” I would like to write something for my boyfriend. This is normal. I am now is in relationship with Nizar and its normal for me to write and talk about him. You can hate me or spread this post to anyone if you think this post annoyed you or something. You can laugh all day long because I don’t speak good English like the way you do, you can slap me because I don’t know how to expressed my feelings but whatever I write here is sincerely from the bottom of my heart. This post might be too early as we just been together for one month’s plus.  However, that is not the problem. Love didn’t count within days. It is depending from how far and how deep the love was when you guys were together. Sometimes if you were dating someone over a few years ahead but the income is not as what u had expected. 

I learnt so much from my past. For the past 3 years I’d living with happiness and sadness at the same time.  Too much of broke up, too much or tears but I don’t want to be known as someone who is holding on grudge over my ex because I’m not. I would like thanks him for letting me know that this broke up is the best thing ever. You made me realize people come and go & relationship is not all about love but trust and honesty. Everything was upside down at first but now I find someone internally can take a good care of me, Nizar Zacariyya. 

For the past few weeks, I always have a problem with myself where some part of me still feel and thought that we were still a good friend. Basically, lot of people assumed that he is my best friend. Somehow, we never declared the BFF part. NEVER. I admit we always went out together, he picked me up from my house, my office but we never had those feelings towards each other.  Soon after that, a lot of rumors between me and him were dating but we never looked at it as a serious matter because we know our policies the best. HA-HA. 

Things just happened in the blink of an eye. I am now with him. He makes me feel specials in any ways. He will always be there for me if I needed him around. Trust me. He will find any way to be there for me without care what the consequences are,after. I can’t find any reason why I need to find anyone else to replace him. Doesn’t matter if he likes to tease me even though he knows it’s not the perfect time to do so because one day later I will miss that a lot. I will. Trust me. 

One thing for sure, we don’t have much time left. We will spread our wings to pursue our studies somewhere and I know the possibilities for us to at least study at the same state about 0.1%. What else to say about studying at the same colleagues or universities. That will be about 0.0%. Hey, i just want you to know,when we are together or when we apart, you are always in my mind, always in my heart.

Lastly but not least,

Thanks for being there when I needed a shoulder to lean on, for patiently listening to my personal problems. I just want you to know how happy am I to have you in my life and I thank Allah for that. When I'm with you, I feel no fear, not even a single one. I know that when you say you love me and I admit that I've fallen for you, I know that I wouldn't shed any tears from now on. I love you and that's what I want you to bear in your mind, and it's for keeps.

Yours and only yours,
Nur Hafizha Husini 

P/S: Totally grammar knocked out. sorry.


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